La música de mi Dios

She doesn't speak English. I don't speak Spanish. There isn't much to say when we see each other day to day. Hello, Hola! How are you? Co'mo esta's? Okay. Bien. That's about all we understand of one another.

On occasion we've talked through an online translator. I found out that my cleaning lady is from Honduras. She has a degree in business, and worked as at a geoscience facility in her country. One week of pay in America is equivalent to one month pay in Honduras. She wants to pay off her house, and then go home with her family.

She sports her little Ipod while cleaning the offices. I plug mine in while answering mail in the early mornings, and sometimes in the afternoon while catching up on paperwork. Once in a while, my speakers are on and she can hear the music. I don't understand her songs, and she doesn't understand mine.

Yesterday, she walked in my office to do her usual routine, and the song, "I Surrender All," by Michael W. Smith and Coalo Zamorano was playing on my speaker. She cried out, "My God, my God, musica MY God! Santificados, Jesus Cristo! Santificados! I love my God!"

There was one thing we clearly understood about one another without translation. We love our God. I clearly understood that we are sanctified by Jesus Christ. No one needed to help us out. I had never seen her so excited about anything, but clearly we connected.

It was so exciting to find a new sister. Where will our new friendship take us? She has been brought to America to escape poverty. May be one day I can go to Honduras too. I don't know what I would do there, but I want to help her people. May be they need Bibles. May be they need musica 'en espanol like Michael W. Smith and Coalo Zamorano, and willing teachers. One thing is very clear, no matter where in the world you call home, God's spirit can take up residency anywhere, in anyone of us.

ONE Perfect Plan

I was in the shower having a conversation with God. It was after a week of silence, and painful days of self pity. I asked God what went wrong with the plan for my work at the boys and girls ranch.

What a lesson to learn as God reminded me that there was only ONE perfect plan. There was ONE person perfect enough to not sin, and not to fall short of His plan. That was His son, Jesus Christ.

I surrendered the path that I chose for my life to His path. The tears that fell washed away by the falling water on my face. A fresh new start with the washing away of the old plans, and the start of a new day.

I AM GOD

My last entry was two months ago. After writing my last entry "ABC Potluck," a troubling turn of events took place for me. The events led me to some deep valleys of soul searching, and over time, treasures in life lessons were revealed. I still don't have the answers, but I came to a deeper reverence for my God.

After 14 years of property management, I was so excited to have been offered a job at a boys and girls ranch. I love the ranch, my husband is a rancher, and we had great aspirations for the cause. The pay was a quarter of what I currently make, but the job had nothing to do with the pay for me, it was all about fulfilling what I felt like was God's calling for my life.

Part of the job offer/package was the ability to have my children with me at the ranch/school. Only three of my six boys would have attended the school. I was very excited about having Trent at the school, especially.

In "ABC Potluck," I voiced my struggles about this child of mine fitting into society. The struggles became slaps in my own face over the next few weeks. As if the words that I spoke were taken into Satan's hand and driven like salt into a wound. The director forgot, or didn't realize that Trent had autism; and, right before starting my new job she said that he could not attend the school. The board thought that a child with disabilities would not fit in with the other children, and that he would be too big of a risk for the activities that take place at the ranch.

I was crushed! Another place that my child did not belong. In my heart, I thought that he would thrive on the ranch. He participated in hippotherapy ( horse riding for autistic), at Retama Ranch in San Antonio, and absolutely loves the outdoors. The worst part of it all, was the fact that I could not afford to have him in school twenty miles away from the ranch that I would be working. It didn't seem fair that I would give of myself, mother these children at the ranch, but my own child could not participate. At the last minute, the job fell through.

I drove away from the ranch thinking to God, "Life is full of spiritual battle, and you know what God? Satan just won this battle. Some things just aren't supposed to happen. You asked me to work here. You provided the way, and opened up a rare opportunity to work at the ranch. You've prepared me all of my career for this move, and it is gone. He won. I wanted to find people to build a chapel, a place of worship. Have new offices attached to the chapel. I had a vision for growth, and place to build further for your kingdom, God, but, Satan won."

I went on for a few minutes about the unfair things that happen in life, weighing the things that were in God's plan versus Satan's plan to destroy us. I asked God to correct me where I was wrong in this thinking. I was so careful not to condemn the events that took place, but to ask God for HIS clarity. As I asked God for His direction he spoke three words, "I AM GOD."

He could have been in the car with me. So clearly did the words speak to me in my heart with a corrective and powerful feeling that overwhelmed me. I was quiet. I heard the words again, "I AM God." This time, they were softer, as if he got my attention, and just needed me to hear again. I drove in silence the rest of the way home. I thought no more about spiritual warfare, or anything. Mind silenced, uncluttered. Just quiet.

God didn't say, your right, or your wrong about the events or road to take. He didn't offer an explanation as to how spiritual warfare takes place. There was no corrective word or insight regarding whether or not I had read his direction for my life correctly or incorrectly. He just said, "I AM GOD." Somehow, I was satisfied in knowing, that was all I needed to know.